Momentum of the Muse

I think what’s happening here is I feel guilty for not keeping up my posting frequency. So, instead of not posting at all anymore, I am making completely unnecessary posts. The thing is, I hate those “I’m sorry I haven’t been posting” posts because I think it’s your right, and half the time I never noticed anyways. I have a bit over 100 blogs in my reader, so I would only ever notice if it was one of my absolute favorite-favorite-favorites. I suppose some others follow maybe only five or two, or one blog, and if it’s one, it should be this one. Because then you won’t have to be bogged down following it – there’s plenty of breathing room in between each post, because I know you’re busy.

But I do feel guilty for not being accountable to myself. That’s the reason I started this blog in the first place. So, I am in the middle of re-structuring and re-focusing exactly what I’m going to talk about. I wanted to talk about writing, but I found myself falling into a rut of writing the same kinds of posts as what I was reading. It wasn’t as fresh or as personally interesting as I would like it. And a lot of it was about a type/way of writing that isn’t what I had initially set out to do.

So, I am likely to move over to more creative topics, but we’ll have to see. I’ve had a talk with a screenwriter who might want to guest post once a week. He’s never had a blog before and he wants to put his toes in the water without actually getting wet. But, I’m not 100% sure of what I want, so in the meantime, I think actually making posts, even if they are about rabbit mittens, is the key to accountability. To myself. Rambling into the abyss. Although, that was a useful post if you happen to have been considering installing google analytics, and wanted to be swayed by that little tidbit, knowing you can figure out what keywords lead people to your blog.

Being accountable to others isn’t something you can control all aspects of. Who knows what people want from you? How do you decide what they want, how to cater to them? You can change it only by targetting those others you surround yourself with, you aim to intrigue. Being accountable to yourself is more fluid.

As I have mentioned previously, I installed Google Analytics. As of a few days ago, the only keyword typed in that had found my site was “Erin Maher.”

A new keyword has joined the family – rabbit mittens! I googled “rabbit mittens” and found that my site was not even in the first 3 pages of results listed. Yet, someone searching through the results saw my blog and clicked through hoping it would be relevant in their search for rabbit mittens.

I suddenly realised that the two people who visit this blog might think I have mittens made out of rabbit. My mittens actually are made out of wool and flannel, but they have bunny ears, nose, eyes and smile on them. I do, however, have ear muffs made out of rabbit, but I didn’t know until well after the fact. Apparently it’s cheaper to actually use real rabbit fur than synthetic fur. I also feel that if you are going to make ear muffs out of rabbit fur, they should be shaped like floppy bunny ears.

Ok, I don’t feel that way at all. It only just occurred to me that in that shape, it could warm your ears just as well as two little round knobs on the side of your head, and look cuter. But, I imagine it would only be cute if they were made from cotton and wool, shaped like bunny ears.

Actually made from rabbit fur would just be in poor taste.

Wow, long awaited. Part 3 of the Construction of True Literature. In Part 1 I showed how I used freewriting to plant the seed of a poem. In Part 2, I discussed meaning, and how there should be some story, some meaning behind any piece of true literature. It does not necessarily matter what that specific meaning is, so long as it is draped in obscurity to the point it becomes nonsense. Now, for Part 3 – finalizing and editing, cementing that piece of True Literature.

Here is my final product, followed by the editing that occured for it to come into existence in it’s final form.

tomorrow trouble is springing back into town.

She’s got her paws on the floor and she’s poised, ready to riot, ready to pounce.

A pair of pig tails, a swagger and a school girl gleam,

we got into the theme with no patience or discretion to spare.

Raw rationality in the heart beating, the greed gleaming over all the ill-gotten gains

we hoarded before, our grins wide with teeth bared,

knuckles braised naughty and sore. Bags swinging malignant and more menacing,

our approach to encroach upon all perceptions of deception,

the lesson to flex some roach-like resilience, the taste of your brilliance, rolling down and over,

far-flung in the mix, the messiest chicks,

so blond and far gone they bleed vinegar and vice,

fingers suck at your skin, a ten-set of lice.

You turn the corner, and before he can warn her, she’s got black-satin-spice to hold in and adorn her,

all matte and eyes flat, as alert as a cat, crouched under couch, tail wound fully cocked,

chest round and pressed to the ground. A vixen throws bricks, shooting the moon of it’s pets,

little pests to crawl clinging up sweaters with vests, and

upturned eyes that decry, of course darling, you’re the best.

I climb as careful as two birds dancing on one stone – the bones are more brittle, I know.

The flush of the thrush flying right up my neck, and I pause,

not caught, but hot for the draw of a lone broken moan.

Now, essentially, the techniques used here are spacing and delete key. I spaced the free write out randomly, and then deleted three words. Two of them were “so” and one was “shooting.” The deletion of “so” was actually practical, for good writing. I have a problem; peppering my sentence beginnings with “So” and “Anyways” and “Well” and “But.” The trick is figuring out which words are unnecessary, superfluous, extra padding with no purpose, extraneous,  redundant – you know what I mean. Then chop them out. Some writer somewhere in some quote once said that a very high percentage of what you write is likely meant to be thrown away. Something like “Write a 100% and then leave only 20%. Then you will be left with all the best stuff.” This is an inexact quote, but it is mostly true. Except in my case, and likely yours. Ours will be perfect with only three words taken out.

This is the final segment in my three part series. If you have anything you would like to contribute – feedback, questions, unending praise – then please do in the comments section.

The other day I posted one of my old free writes. Free writing is one of my favorite ways to shake the cobwebs out of my brain. You just get your fingers going, and kick making sense in the ass. My previous message was all about getting it out, getting it down. Getting what out and down? Your ideas, of course. Which brings me to today’s post, which is all about having good ideas.

All literature has to have some idea. The poems I read on the bus always have some kind of “Aha!’ idea. But those poems are dumbed down for the public, written by sell-outs, and my former creative writing teacher, actually. I stole his poem off the bus and hung it on my wall, next to my Korn posters. Once again, how cool was I? Back to the poems on the bus – you are too good to write like that. True geniuses take their amazing idea, and hide it – cloak it, if you will – in obscurity. Your reader should have no idea what the hell you’re talking about. They should have to make a hundred wrong guesses about what you meant in their ninth grade English class. Then their teacher should tell them what you really meant, and blow all their minds about how wrong they are. And even then, the teacher is wrong too!

But still. It’s very important to have an idea behind any piece of literature. So, I’m going to deconstruct the piece I shared with you yesterday, and show you the idea behind it. Here is what I was actually talking about.

• “So, tomorrow trouble is springing back into town.” The first three sentences are me pumping myself up with confidence for the next day. But not a good kind of confidence, naughty confidence. Because I knew that I was going to slaughter my new credit card on a shopping trip. It’s like free money! Ahh, to be 19 again.
• “Bags swinging malignant and more menacing” This is found amidst a bunch of mumbo jumbo that basically means, I realize that using my credit card to buy shoes and clothes is wrong. I know it’s wrong, but I’m 19 and I’m living for the moment/letting loose, because my over-protective parents set a curfew of “when the streetlights turn on” until I turn 40, and it gets dark in Canada in the winter at 4 p.m – this is all their fault! So, I’m buying those jeans, and throw in the earrings for good measure.
• “She’s got black-satin-spice to hold in and adorn her, all matte and eyes flat, as alert as a cat,” Here I am referring to myself as a predator, imagining all the energy and confidence my new purchases will infuse me with. Tomorrow is the start of a new me, starting with some high heels and a slinky LBD.
• “Little pests to crawl clinging up sweaters with vests,” I happened to be watching the news, and there was this interest section showcasing a new fashion trend. Women would purchase bugs – beetles, I think – with jewels attached to them, and a little chain. The women would then chain the little bugs to their sweaters, where they would wander around, glittering and sparkling away. I threw it in the poem – why not?
• “The flush of the thrush flying right up my neck, and I pause, not caught, but hot for the draw of a lone broken moan” This is me getting far too excited over my upcoming tryst in the mall.

Now, there’s that, all broken down for you. Do you see now why this poem is superior to 99.9% of the poetry produced over poetry.com? It’s because you had no idea in hell what I was referring to.

Or did you?

Either way, my poetry is matchless, sublime and marvelous.

Stay tuned for Part 3, where I edit and then unveil the finished product!

I may have previously mentioned this, but in college, for two years, I majored in poetry. Creative writing, with a very specific focus on poetry. My parents were super proud and supportive – cough. Basically, once I received my associates in poetry, I threw in my towel at McDonald’s because the recruiters were lining up around the block. With that kind of degree, who wouldn’t? The people who invented Google invited me on as a partner with equal share, but I respectfully declined. I had bigger plans for myself. Bigger plans that an creative writing associates degree, focusing on poetry? Impossible! What chould be bigger than that?

A bachelors degree in anthropology, obviously.

When I was majoring in poetry, I would say things like “I like poetry – but only GOOD poetry.” AKA my own. Since then, I have come to realize that my poetry wasn’t necessarily that good. But who cares, because how good are your poems, anyways? It’s subjective, you bastards. Ahem – sorry, that poet’s temperament again, I’ll return to drinking my cheap wine straight from the bottle to quell my bitter heart. I also had two blogs where I would post randomness and nonsense. It was my specialty, and I was very lofty about it. OH MY GOD, I am so obscure, how deep is that? But I enjoyed doing it. I would free write in my blog, and then turn it into a poem for my class. Anyways, here is me quoting myself from back in the day.

So, tomorrow trouble is springing back into town. She’s got her paws on the floor and she’s poised, ready to riot, ready to pounce. A pair of pig tails, a swagger and a school girl gleam, we got into the theme with no patience or discretion to spare. Raw rationality in the heart beating, the greed gleaming over all the ill-gotten gains we hoarded before, our grins wide with teeth bared, knuckles braised naughty and sore. Bags swinging malignant and more menacing, our approach to encroach upon all perceptions of deception, the lesson to flex some roach-like resilience, the taste of your brilliance, rolling down and over, far-flung in the mix, the messiest chicks, so blond and far gone they bleed vinegar and vice, fingers suck at your skin, a ten-set of lice. So you turn the corner, and before he can warn her, she’s got black-satin-spice to hold in and adorn her, all matte and eyes flat, as alert as a cat, crouched under couch, tail wound fully cocked, chest round and pressed to the ground. A vixen throws bricks, looting and shooting the moon of it’s pets, little pests to crawl clinging up sweaters with vests, and upturned eyes that decry, of course darling, you’re the best.

I climb as careful as two birds dancing on one stone – the bones are more brittle, I know. The flush of the thrush flying right up my neck, and I pause, not caught, but hot for the draw of a lone broken moan.

Tomorrow I will post the thought processes that were going through my mind. Then, on Day Three, the finished product.

Oooohhh. Exciting.

I recently started a new job working in a wine room. So much for quitting such a short time ago! But seriously, I can try new wines everyday, for free, and it’s something I’m very interested/excited to learn about. The opportunity was too good to pass up.

Anyways, I’ve had a little bit of “blah” in my blogging lately. This translates to … not blogging! I started over-thinking, what is my focus? Do I need to switch to a new one – start a new blog? – or re-direct a focus in a way that re-inspires me?

I mulled over a fashion/beauty blog, so I could post pictures of clothes and squeal away. However, I prefer leaving my hair unbrushed, au naturel, and throwing haphazard clothing on, with little regard for current trends or respect for color co-ordination, at least half of the time. The other half of the time is when I’m feeling blue, and throw on this silver and black medieval style gown that I have, with a corset top and full skirt. Nothing cheers more than uber formal attire! Actually, I was a bear for Halloween this past October, and that one has been showing up during a grumpy mood more often than the gown. I do have a sexy Santa’s Elf costume that’s begging to be thrown on, but I’m waiting for the big event of Christmas Eve at my boyfriend’s parents place. They’re a little older, reigned in and laced up to some extent, so it should liven things up. “Who here’s been naughty ?” Rawr, grr, wink, xoxo. So, basically, I don’t want to live up to fashionista blogger standards. I’d rather wear my bunny rabbit mittens to the ice rink, thank you very much.

I thought about food/wine blogging, but the reason I’m working in this wine business is to learn, not make an exhibition of myself. My posts, unless I copied off the back of the bottle/other people online/googling varietals and making assumptions, would be much like this – “This red wine smells of … red wine on the nose. Swirl, swirl. (See how I swirl? I practice this at home to look ultra professional at work. Ooo, fancy, profficient and exuberant swirling without any spillage.) This red wine offers a rich mouthfeel, with hints of red wine, red wine, and red wine. The tannins are as they are with red wine, only more or less strong/grippy than some other red wines I have tried previously. Stay tuned for my next post, where I try a white wine. It looks the same as this post, with the word “white” replacing “red” throughout.” Well, I’m just kidding. I know a little bit more than that.

Anyways, neither of those blogs are coming. I know my three readers are probably disappointed.

Basically, I decided that, instead of narrowing my niche, I should broaden it. I wrote about how much I learned since I started blogging, and I want to write about twitter apps/stumbleupon/installing analytics/RSS button placement/firefox add ons … whatever.

But I also want to write a poem.

So I’m going to, in my next post. I realized, to get over blahs, you have to go with your passions. And the thing about riding on momentum of a muse, is the you don’t always end up with 10 Ways to Improve Your Query, or The Seven Deadly Sins to Avoid (To Create Killer Copy!). Sometimes you end up with I Like Cheese – Who DOESN’T?!?! One woman’s journey through the wonderful world of cheese. Or whatever. I mean, Barney’s Girl from the fashion blog I Am Fashion recently hi-jacked the blog to include financial news. How has the hottest hosiery translated down from Chanel to streetwear? What did Citigroup’s shares jump up to after a 20 billion dollar injection from the recent bail out? Not to worry – you can find these two totally related things at I Am Fashion.

So, if Barney’s Girl does it, then I’m doing it too! Minus the financial updates – I can make a firm promise on that one.

I found this little writing exercise. It’s a quick one – 60 seconds, a one word prompt, and your words get e-mailed to you.

The one thing I would have changed about it is the e-mail aspect. I would rather be able to grab my words, copy and paste right there.

I started this blog in the summer, and over two seasons have learned a lot. I started from a platform of knowing very, very little about blogging and writing online. All I knew is that I like to write. Mostly poetry. And poetry pays jack all, so I better get practical and surf the wave of the future.

Some things I have learned about:

• How to navigate through blogger.
• How to use WordPress.
• How to make text into a link. Seriously.
• The difference between online content vs print.
• How to create or install a widget.
• How to use Twitter, and many twitter apps.
• How to use a reader to maximize the amount of blogs I follow.
• What RSS, CSS, TypePad, Drupal, Ruby on Rails, Java, SEO, Adsense are/mean. Basically.
• What StumbleUpon, Digg, Twitter, Sphinn, Reddit, Technorati, Feedburner are.
• What is Alexa and Compete, and how to install the toolbars.
• How to install Google AdSense. How to check it religiously to see if I’ve made another 1.32 cents, Oh my God, I have, yell at my boyfriend to let him know while he smiles patronisingly and congratulates me on how amazing that is.
• How to install Google Analytics. Completed yesterday – woot, woot! Another thing I can check religiously for teensy, tiny incremental numbers. My favorite hobby.

And probably countless more things that I just can’t remember anymore. Next thing up, how to make a truck load of money. Or enough money so that I can buy cute shoes instead of moaning and posting totally unrelated pictures on my blog. But, my point; I have learned about a lot of things I never even knew existed. I’m really glad I decided to do this, and I’m excited to see what I’ll learn in the next two seasons.

The verdict is in – I am a big fan of StumbleUpon!

The Cons:

• You can lose a LOT of time stumbling around. You can really fall down the rabbit hole. I kept clicking Stumble after Stumble after Stumble – lo and behold – FOUR hours had passed, and it was 4 a.m. Just call me Alice in StumbleLand.
• The Facebook app is ridiculous. You should be able to add it without having to invite every single friend on your list. I know that list needs cleaning, and I hate being one of those people who sends a weird random invite to some social thing they could care less about, especially since they met me one time. Probably after I had two martinis, became their best friend, and exclaimed repeatedly that “We should totally do something!” I’ll digress just in case there is a way out of this, but I couldn’t find it.
• You sometimes hit a lot of garbage before you hit the gold. The Original Fart Fact website? Shudder …

The Pros:

• When you’re locked for ideas, inspiration can be found. I ran into some neat sites, that got my brain out of it’s slump. I kept my word processor and my mind open to ideas, jotted them down, and got a whole whack of new material to work with.
• User based, user verified. It’s like the Zagat ratings, although I trust the Zagat ratings more than a stumble. But, sometimes google will get you to a result that nobody would give a thumbs up to. You get a result that makes your face go thumbs down in terms of being totally useless. So, as stumbler, you give it that hearty thumbs down it deserves and move on to greener fields.
• Get traffic to your blog or sites. By making friends with fellow stumblers, they can stumble your posts, you stumble theirs. You give me a hot stone massage and pedicure, I teach you how to make origami – that old saying and deal. Social media is all the rage, so I figured I’d focus on some speed of implementation, try these sites out. A healthy mix of a couple social media outlets is a great way to make new contacts, learn from them, teach them, mingle and mix to share all things good.

So, if you decide to try out stumbleupon, or you’re already on it, feel free to friend me here.

If you have any other pros, cons or thoughts, please feel free to share in the comments.

All right, already.

I stopped posting my NaNoWriMo progress because I stopped writing on it. Eek. I wrote just over twenty thousand words, and promptly lost all motivation once I fell desperately behind. The funny thing is, on December 1st and 2nd I wrote over two thousand words each day. Once the pressure was off, I felt a lot more like writing. Even though I gave up, it was a good experience. I have never even attempted a novel, so by even attempting, I have already bested myself. I plan on trying it next year again, and I will keep on working on my current novel in my spare time.

Some things I will do differently next year:

• Write an outline beforehand. Or PERIOD. Not having an outline is confusing and frustrating, especially with this head, which I swear is made of a flock of seagulls that just met an unleashed golden retriever puppy. By that, I mean scatterbrained. In my one novel, I must have at least six seperate novels and styles.
• Decide on a daily goal of either word count or defined scene/chapter/thing within the outline. Telling yourself to be accountable in general is one thing, but going about it diligently, professionally, with purpose and intent is quite another thing. Laissez faire is no tactic in this business.
• Leave days for leeway. Everyone needs some room to stretch, to be busy, to breathe, to sleep in and do nothing all day because you accidentally finished a whole bottle of wine at a friend’s get-together the night before. Without guilt. Work hard, play hard, living life to the fullest despite NaNoWriMo.
• Do some research and legwork before hand. My story had several characters based on mythological characters, characters in traditional folklore but set in the modern day. Having some research and character sketches before hand would have saved me hours of bouncing around wikipedia, googling my head off, and interrupting the flow of my writing. I don’t know if I’ll do anything like this next year, but having the bulk of my research done beforehand will be a benefit regardless of subject.

Any fellow participants have input on what they did that worked this year, or what they will do differently next year?