Momentum of the Muse

For awhile, I was writing for hours everyday. And I don’t mean, organising my e-mail inbox, twittering, getting distracted by my stumble button … I mean full-fledged pounding away at the keys, replacing my keyboard at the end of every day. All because somebody had the hare-brained idea of daring me, saying I couldn’t do my writing in mittens.

Not really. But I am known throughout google for my rabbit mittens, as told to me several times now by Google Analytics. So, that ones for you Rabbit Mitten people.

Anyways, I would write up a storm. And then, I would have a moment of self-relfection here and there. Sitting in a big comfy arm chair, scribbling in my notebook. On the skytrain, sunlight shooting through the window, broken into fragments, shrapnel, warming me up. I would write in my notebook “I never write anymore.” Yet, I was writing 3 hours a day, 4 hours, maybe even 6 hours once or twice. That’s nothing to shake a lobster at, right?

But I was writing how-to articles. Blog posts. Lists of beauty tips. Greening your office newsletters. Random,

I tried nanowrimo which basically just made throw up inside my word processor.

I’ve read a lot of writing advice books, full of tips on what other writer’s did to put their muse in a chokehold until they said uncle.

• Sit, and just write, force yourself to everyday.
• Brainstorm.
• Free write.
• Write what you know, pull from life.
• Sit and write “I don’t know what to write, I don’t know what to write …” over and over until you do know.

But, I saw The Shining. We know how that ended, and I don’t what you’re into writing buddy, but that sick and twisted business just isn’t for me.

So far, the only thing I’ve found that works to inspire me in fiction is getting out there. Not necessarily outside, but doing something different, changing up my day to day, even just a little. It injects an energy into everything I do, most especially my fiction. I quit punching my muse in the face, mean mugging my computer screen, and froze her out. The muse hates to be ignored – they have egos the size of Manitoba. They like to be stroked and coddled like the precious and cute little kittens that they sure as Hell aren’t. Then they still don’t put out, those wiley vixens. They even prefer the outright beatings to being ignored. So, as soon as I stopped hassling my muse, indulging in other business, she came running.

What tips or ideas do you have that help you write your favorite kind of writing? What inspires you?

This may be the laziest post I’ve ever written, but I like quotes, so it’s happening anyways. Sometimes when I need a jolt, or *cough* procrastinating on my nanowrimo *cough*, I browse around through them. Sop, today I saved a couple and figured I’d share.

• Substitute “damn” every time you’re inclined to write “very;” your editor will delete it and the writing will be just as it should be -Mark Twain
• If my doctor told me I had only six minutes to live, I wouldn’t brood. I’d type a little faster. -Isaac Asimov
• I am returning this otherwise good typing paper to you because someone has printed gibberish all over it and put your name at the top. -English Professor (Name Unknown), Ohio University
• No one means all he says, and yet very few say all they mean, for words are slippery and thought is viscous. -Henry Brooks Adams, The Education of Henry Adams, 1907
• I’d rather be caught holding up a bank than stealing so much as a two-word phrase from another writer. -Jack Smith
• If I had to give young writers advice, I would say don’t listen to writers talking about writing or themselves. -Lillian Hellman

And, saving the best for last – ahem.

What is writing? Is it the bird in the hand? Is an idle brain the devil’s workshop? DOES the second mouse get the cheese? No one can really define for certain that sublime display of power/fireworks/gourmet word cookery as the chisel hits the tablet, the pen hits the page, the chalk hits the board, and the fingers bash away at the hot chocolate encrusted keyboard. Is it endless spider solitaire, and mahjong? Is it knowing the darkest depths of the internet – religious sex toys and videos of people crying while eating various foods – and then playing free rice to improve your karma after horrifically discovering amputee porn? Is it dressing your pets up as rock stars, dancing around, playing “Welcome to the Jungle” for half an hour when you have a deadline? Is it becoming obsessed over a debate in a forum, tracking down the offensive dissenter, and making a voodoo hair doll after stealing their brush? Yes, my friends, that is the beauty of writing. – Erin Maher

Please include any gems in the comments section.